I suppose I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon watching Thor rescue someone who isn’t Tom Hiddleston.

(The movie is EXTRACTION, on Netflix. So far pretty standard; I have tea and a cooling cherry tart.)

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I’ve noticed this before, but Thor has some very nice forearms.

And we have a murder by pitchfork/garden rake. Okay, movie. I’m sold.

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I mean, I’m not cheap, but I can be had. Forearms, nice blue eyes, and a pitchfork murder? I’m on board.

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Obligatory shirtless scene. I haven’t felt this obliged by a movie since PACIFIC RIM started its first robot battle.

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“If you want to live you have to trust me.”

So far, we’re ticking all the boxes. All we’re missing is a time-traveling, homicidal robot!

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Although I have to admit hearing Thor yell “FUCK OFF” in Aussie while driving at high speed is absolutely my cuppa.

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Cue John Wick gun-fu. I have to go make dinner soon, but I’ll be back.

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The kid lost his bulletproof vest (I sense a plot point) and Thor actually had to reload. Okay, I’m still in…

…but dinner has to be made. Sigh.

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Fettuccine arrabbiata and cherry tart consumed, a glass of Syrah to the good, we’re ready for the last hour and a half of EXTRACTION.

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Thor’s really been working on his parkour. He wants to prove to Hawkeye that he doesn’t NEED to fly to get the job done.

Clint just nods and rolls his eyes.

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It’s really a shame Randeep Hooda doesn’t get more box-office play. He more than holds his own in every scene he’s in.

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Knife fight interrupted by scooter!

Movie, you truly know the way to my heart, especially after a glass or two of Syrah.

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Then the movie hits Thor with a small blue car.

I may have started cackling and yelling “OH CRAP!” so loudly the dogs are Concerned.

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Thor, undeterred, hits Randeep Hooda with a bus.

I’m glad I broke for dinner. This movie, like most, is ever so much better with wine.

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Ingenue Kid: “You hit him with a truck.”

Thor, clinging grimly to tasseled steering wheel: “…yep.”

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“Okay, kid, we’re gonna jump on three.”

“What?”

“One, two…” *shove*

I am cackling nonstop now.

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So far, Randeep Hooda is stealing every damn scene in this movie he’s allowed to even get near.

PUT HIM IN MORE MOVIES.

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Ingenue Kid: “Here, have some tea.”

Thor: *breaks open bottle of Oxy with teeth* “THOR NEEDS NO CUPPA.”

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Ingenue Kid: “Fine.” *drinks tea*

Me: “Good call, kid.”

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